Tag Archives: Hairstory
November 28, 2011 

Salon Reviews: Pearson Lanes Hair Studio

I feel good, y’all. You know why? Because I think I’ve found my new hair home!

I’ve found a stylist who works with my hair SO WELL – and the results are always on point! Allow me to introduce you to the work of Keren at Pearson Lanes Hair Studio in Whitby, ON.

I first met Keren back in April, when she was hired to be the hairstylist for my cousin’s wedding. As I was a bridesmaid, she hooked me up with an awesome side-swept style with luscious curls (see pic 1 above). My hair was already flat-ironed, and she whipped that style into shape in no time. Whatever tactics she used enabled the style to last for DAYS, and my hair had zero heat damage.

For my own wedding in August, I knew I had to have Keren on board. She came solo and took care of myself and the bridal party with no problems. She was able to manipulate hair of various texture (natural, weaved, permed) into gorgeous styles that held up on that hot summer day. You can see my retro curled updo in pics 2 and 3, and my niece’s cornrow/twist combo in pic 4.

This weekend when I needed a trim, I decided to head east to Keren’s shop. I had no issues booking an appointment with her earlier in the week, but it was something she did on Saturday morning that really impressed me:

My appointment was for 2pm. Keren gave me a call around 11:30am, stating that she was running a bit behind with other clients…would I mind coming in half an hour later? I had no problem with that, and was very impressed that she had the forethought to call me in advance so that I didn’t show up at 2pm and then twiddle my thumbs for 30 minutes.

The cute, quaint, and clean shop is easy to find -  just a few minutes drive from the Brock Street exit off the 401. I showed up, and Keren was ready to go! Let me tell you, she did not disappoint! I went in for a simple wash, style, and trim, but the care and knowledge that Keren used made all the difference. No yanking my hair to detangle, no scratching the hell out of my scalp while washing, no burning my hair off with high-heat appliances, and no mistaking a “trim” for a “haircut”!

I almost let out a sigh of relief when I left the salon (did I mention that I didn’t leave broke either?) – I felt like I finally found a professional who I can trust with my hair, and THAT is hard to find these days. Next up for Keren and I? My long-awaited colour…in light of the recent news about harmful PPD products in hair dye (like my girl Ro talked about here), Keren confirmed that all of her professional hair colour products are PPD free!

If you’re looking for a versatile stylist, especially my natural-haired ladies, you might want to give Keren a try! Check out Pearson Lanes Hair Studio’s Facebook page here, and if you have any other questions, feel free to hit me up!

November 9, 2011 

Honeymoon Hair: Straight to Kinky & Everything In Between

Do you remember the post I wrote recently on vacation hair? I had my St. Lucia trip in mind, but had no clue how drastically different this vacation would be compared to those in the past. Where on previous trips, I was able to maintain one or two different styles for the duration of the trip, this trip had me in a different style almost every day!

When we arrived in St. Lucia, I still had my hair pressed from my visit to Urban Textures. The air conditioning on the shuttle from the airport to resort keep me cool and intact…

…but a short time in the humid island weather had me poufing out like nobody’s business! For dinner on the first night, I slicked back the front and pulled my hair into a low side ponytail/pouf situation – it worked though!

I was able to enjoy a day at the pool the following day….since I figured my hair would get wet at some point then, I just pulled those poufy tresses up into a high bun, and held down my flyaways with a black headband made from the leg of some old pantyhose (Goody ain’t got nothin’ on me!):

After splish-splashing in the pool and the Caribbean Sea, I ended up co-washing and twisting with some gel and shea butter, then pinned them up for the night, and the next day…

Later that day, it was time to let those twists loose…the humidity was SO much kinder to my curls!

After spending another day on and in the water (speedboating, snorkeling, bathing in mud and doing photo shoots under waterfalls), needless to say, a redo was necessary:

I loved this snakeskin/50′s roll + headwrap combo….I twisted my hair into what I call “loose” Bantu knots – I coiled the twists flat against my head and bobbypinned them instead of twisting into the regular knots that hold themselves together. I had two twists in the front that I had no clue what to do with, and since my hair was still wet, I got a couple more bobbypins out…coiled the two twists around each other, then tied on a headwrap leaving the front out. Black winged liner, my fave specs, and a red lip and I was good to go!

The next day, I undid the twists, but as usually happens with anything Bantu-related, my hair was not fully dry. I let my hair down, pinned back the sides to force fullness in the back (and cover the frizzy damp parts), and hit the road. Not the greatest pic, but here ya go:

I ended up back in the water after our morning at the school, but preferred taking a nap over staying up to twist my hair again…so for dinner that night, I pulled out a few clips and bobbypins and got to work on a quick updo:

French-rolled in the back and held in place with clips, I took the front piece and twisted it back and to the side, then pinned it in place. Do you recognize that peek of blue I’m wearing? It’s the same Henkaa dress I wore here, but I tried a sweetheart style:

Did I mention I LOVE these dresses? I need another one ASAP because y’all are going to be tired of seeing this one!

By this point, our trip was almost over. My hair either stayed pinned up or thrown into a messy bun. For our last night, we headed off the resort and to a nearby street party that pops off every Friday night. I was feeling hella lazy at this point, so it was all about jeans, a tank top, and lipgloss. That’s it. I had my hair in a bun, but hadn’t slicked the front down to my liking, so I threw on a silk scarf:

The next day, it was time to call it a week, and hop on that plane home.

So, what tools did I bring with me?

  • Herbal Essences Hello Hydration conditioner
  • Ampro gel
  • Shea butter
  • Elastics
  • Pantyhose headband
  • Bobbypins
  • Banana clips
  • 2 Headscarves

And that’s it! For me, it was minimal work with maximum style…just the way I likes it! I ensured that I loaded up with conditioner before I headed out for the day, in order to keep my hair moist under the hot sun, and protected from chlorine and salt in the water. As soon as we got back to the room, I would rinse or just spritz my hair with water and add more conditioner. I would *try* to sleep with my silk headscarf, but that didn’t always happen ;) Other than that, I didn’t worry about my hair too much…I was too busy having fun!

There you have it – my honeymoon week hair! Do you have any vacation plans coming up? Are you already setting your hair plans in motion, or do you just go with the flow?

October 18, 2011 

Hair Adventures: How Far Do You Go?

I’ve always been the type to try new things with my ‘do. At 16, I wanted a Halle Berry cut (which my stylist refused to d0). Throughout university, I coloured my hair blue-black, light brown, red, blonde, full head, highlights, you name it. Even going natural, I’ll do wash n’ gos, twist-outs, braid-outs, flat irons, roller sets, curlformers, ANYTHING. Granted, not everything has looked good on me, and not everything has been good for my hair (relaxer + colour, anybody?), but when the boredom hit me, I’d be down for whatever.

I remember once I started wearing my hair naturally, I told a girlfriend that I was bored, and was ready to hit the salon for a new colour. She looked at me incredulously and asked why I’d want to damage my hair just when I’d gotten it to such a healthy point…to which I just gave her a Kanye shrug. She was of the belief that once your hair is natural and healthy, you do whatever you can to keep it that way, and avoid ANYTHING that might damage it. Like scarves. And bobby pins. And hot water. And probably car headrests.  She also believed that once you colour your hair, you no longer belong to the “Natural club” as she called it…but that’s another discussion for another day. I was of the train of thought that, one, as long as I maintained optimal hair care, my hair would likely still thrive since it was only going through one of the two chemical processes that it used to; and two, that it was my hair, and I’ll do what I damn well please. She clucked like a disapproving mother hen, but I went ahead with my colour as planned – and LOVED it.

Here are a few of my colour and style moves:

Blonde-ish Twist-Out Ambition

Straight Caramel Streaks

Red Hot Wash n' Go (with my screwfaced brother)

Back to Black w/ The Swoop Bang

My personal view is that while having healthy hair is my top priority, having fun is almost equal. As long as you know how to take care of your hair, you’ll be fine! Doing a colour? Make sure you step up your moisturizing regimen. Going for a new cut? Make sure you know how it’ll look when you rock it curly vs. straight. And if worst comes to worst, remember that it’s just hair – it’ll grow back!

How adventurous are you with your hair? And if you aren’t adventurous, why not? What have been your best and worst styles to date? I just booked an appointment for some more adventure, so I’ll have an update later in the week!

October 10, 2011 

Stylin’ & Profilin’: Wedding Guest Edition

Last night, I went to the last wedding in my 6 month wedding season of 2011. We were invited to 8 weddings this year, and were able to attend 6 of them…plus we had our own, so you can say 2011 was definitely the Year of the Wedding! Each wedding was gorgeous in its own right, and I loved seeing how creative people got with making their special day stand out.

However, as a guest invited to so many weddings, the problem becomes: What do I wear??? I can’t even say this is a women’s issue either, because most of the men I know are very fashionable too, and aren’t trying to get tagged in someone’s Facebook pic wearing the same thing they wore to a wedding last month…

Yesterday’s wedding was probably one of my favourite overall looks, if I do say so myself :) Even though my hair kind of fell apart by the end of the night, I still managed to make it work:

Details on the dress: this is a convertible dress by a Toronto-based design company called Henkaa – I chose these dresses for my bridesmaids, and made sure I grabbed one for myself! These dresses truly work for ANY BODY: they come in a ton of colours; short and long versions; plus-sized options; and you can tie them in a million different ways. I’ll need to pick up a couple more, because I could rotate the Henkaa dress in my wardrobe an infinite amount of ways!

As for the hair, I wanted to try a regimen I’ve seen on a number of other natural hair sites. On Friday night, I washed and deep conditioned my hair (using the products I mention here), then twisted it into about 8 thick twists. The idea was to allow the hair to dry in a stretched state, then set the actual style the next day.

On Saturday morning, I undid the twists, then re-twisted into about 20 twists and pincurled them, laying them flat to my head with bobby pins. I decided to try this versus doing bantu knots, because I wanted to be able to tie my hair down flat for the day, which is impossible with my bantu knot styles. I couldn’t for the LIFE of me find my silk scarves, so I tied my hair down with a satin scarf, then did a cute headwrap with a larger cotton wrap. This is very important for me, because cotton sucks the moisture right out of your hair. I’ve learned from my mistakes of tying down my hair with cotton scarves, then waking up the next day to parched hair – never again! I always ensure that before anything cotton touches my head, there is something silk or satin as a buffer in-between.

Off I went for my day and night….then woke up Sunday morning, ready to unravel and create my wedding style:

My pincurled twists turned out into a cool, serpentine wave, but wasn’t set well enough to leave down. So I grabbed my trusty bucket of bobby pins, and got to pinning, and ended up with this cute, curly, side-pinned bouffant style:

I learned that while I liked this regimen and style, I definitely need to trim some dead ends that looked a bit straggly. I also need to play around with the placement of the pincurls so that it doesn’t look too separated and scalpy when I take them down. Other than that, I ended up happy that my hair dresser was busy and couldn’t take me on Saturday! I got this style for $free.99!

September 29, 2011 

Wedding Styles for Naturals

Even though we’re out of the traditional wedding season, this is 2011. People are getting married every month, day, and time you could imagine. Therefore, I think it’s fitting to cover a question that I’m sure all natural brides will face at some point:

“Soooo….how are you going to do your hair?”

I recently got married (almost our 2-month anniversary, y’all!), and I was asked this question almost every time I talked about wedding planning. Sometimes the question was genuine. Sometimes it had a tinge of worry to it, and I’d know that the inquirer was really thinking, “I KNOW she’s not going to walk down the aisle with that nappy head…”

I was able to just laugh it off, but I know for some, it may throw shade all over the plans you had for that cute twist-out or curly updo. So, what do you do if you’re a natural-haired bride-to-be, looking for that perfect style?

A lot of sites have begun specific features on natural hairstyles for brides, and I was SO thankful for these resources when I was making my plans. Here are some great clicks:

Inspiration for Natural Hair Brides by Afrobella – gorgeous photos and ideas

Black Bridal Bliss – see her Tie The Knot Tuesdays feature to see real brides

Essence.com’s Bridal Bliss feature – more amazing weddings and hairstyles

Natural Hair Brides – an amazing Tumblr site

Curly Nikki – look for her Natural Bride features for beautiful style submissions

Here are some photos for inspiration:

Photo: CurlyNikki.com

Photo: NaturalHairBrides.tumblr.com

Photo: yourbridalstop.com

So, what did I end up doing with my hair on my day? Eh, some may say I sold out, but I chose the style I fell in love with. I had my hair blown out, flat ironed, and pin curled into a gorgeous retro style that just set my whole look off. It held up amazingly well in the summer heat, and the curls dropped beautifully in the days following the wedding:

Never mind my big mouth...I had been rocking this humidity ravaged twist-out for a few days

I've noticed my hair looks darker when straight, lighter when curly...

The wonders of gravity

Getting closer to the final product....

Makeup and pin curls...gotta love it

Rear view

All smiles!

All wedding photos courtesy of StarStruck Photography

Hair by Keren Chung of Pearson Lanes Hair Studio

Makeup by Faces by Pureness

As you can see, I went straight, but tried out so many varieties of natural curly styles during my planning. The best thing I learned was that there are a multitude of natural styles out there for brides-to-be, and curly hair can most definitely be formal and elegant, versus casual and carefree as it is usually portrayed.

If you’re a natural, curly-haired lady looking for that ideal formal style, don’t let anyone convince you that your kinks and curls aren’t good enough!  Overall, do what YOU feel is right, and go with the style that makes you feel the most comfortable and beautiful – your intuition won’t steer you wrong!

Have you ever struggled to find a formal, natural hairstyle? For my married naturals, how did you style your hair for the wedding day? Have you had anyone attempt to deter you from a style choice? How did you handle it? And not to worry, more wedding details will be coming soon!

September 22, 2011 

HairStory: The Easy Way Out

Photo: fittothefinish.com

I’ve been playing around with how to blog about my past 3 years of being natural, but it seemed like such a daunting task. Sure, I’ve covered a quick history here and here, but what to do for those who want a bit more info on the growing pains and pleasures I went through?

I remembered a little site I stumbled upon back in August 2008 – Fotki.com. A photo-hosting site, Fotki seems to be mainly utilized by photographers who wanted to show off their art, but also became the perfect site for us amateurs to document our hair escapades. I’d log on to see others’ hair progress, styles, and products, then finally created my own profile to share with the world.

To see some of my earlier styles and regimens, check out my Fotki profile here! I don’t keep up with it as regularly as I used to, but it’s still a great resource. And please, don’t laugh at my pics. Lol!

On a side note, I took down my twists from the other day. The JessiCurl Confident Curls solution gave my hair the right amount of hold, so I think I’ll try it again on my next wash. Because I pulled my twists back into a bun to stretch them for a day, some of my ends came out straighter or looser than the rest of my hair. Nothing a little shower steam and coconut oil can’t fix…however, recent rainy days didn’t help to maintain the curl definition, so I have a bit of puffiness going on…anyways, here’s a pic of the results as of today!

September 19, 2011 

Hair TLC: Been Such A Long Time…

“Been such a long time/I forgot that I was fine”

 These are Ms. Erykah Badu’s words, but they fit my life right now.

I’ve 100% been neglecting myself lately. Especially my hair.

Life has gotten extra busy, and I’m finding that it’s hard to find the time I used to have to dedicate to styling, trying new products, or hell, even detangling properly. Over the past few months, I’ve been washing when I can, throwing in some sloppy 2-strand twists, and hoping for the best. I usually end up resorting to some kind of updo, either pulled back in a bun/puff or pinned up, but I find that when I leave my hair in protective styles for too long, the tangles almost have to be torn out. Not good, and totally defeats my intent of having healthy, happy hair.

Tonight, I decided I would take some time for me, and properly take care of my hair for once. I plugged my iPhone into the bathroom speakers, hit shuffle, and jumped in the shower. Here’s a quick glance at what I did tonight:

Hello Hydration is the TRUTH!

I wet my hair a bit and used my fingers to pull apart the biggest tangles, then slathered on my favourite cheap conditioner, Herbal Essences’ Hello Hydration. This stuff is the truth at like $3 a pop….I love it as a detangler and a leave in – which means I go through this stuff like toilet paper. Anyways, I made sure to use enough conditioner so that it covered all of my hair and squished through my fingers. Let it sit for a minute while I washed my face, then used my handy-dandy wide tooth comb to detangle my hair, patiently, section by section. I could tell my hair has been crying out for some TLC…the amount of shed hair wasn’t DRASTIC, but definitely showed my neglect.

Elasta QP DPR-11 = deep conditioning goodness

Next, I rinsed out the HEHH and applied my newfound hair nectar of the gods…Elasta QP’s DPR-11 – a deep conditioner with 11 different botanical ingredients (see product description here) to transform dry, parched hair into silky smooth goodness. This is my 3rd time using it, and every time I do, I fall in love all over again. I slapped the DPR-11 on and massaged it through my hair from root to ends, then pinned my hair up while I showered – I call it the Poor Chick’s Steam Treatment. If you have time, you could also use a heating cap with the DPR-11, or wrap your hair in Saran wrap and then cover it with a towel – leave it on for 15-2o minutes, then wash out for a cheap deep treatment. I’ll be honest – I wasn’t that ambitious tonight.

After my hair was pinned up, I took a nice, long, hot shower. The very last thing I did was rinse the DPR-11 out with cool water – cooler water seals your hair cuticle and locks in moisture, so the colder, the better. I also learned a new drying trick: instead of drying hair with a regular ole towel, I read about using a microfibre towel, or if you like to cut corners like me, a cotton T-shirt. Bath towels easily tear your hair, so using a cotton T-shirt soaks up the excess water without damaging your curls.

JessiCurl...giving you a test run

I decided on my staple style – the 2-strand twist, simply because it’s quick and easy, and when I take my time, it comes out looking pretty damn good! At Afrobella’s event on Saturday, I won a beautiful gift basket courtesy of I Heart My Hair. Included was a bottle of JessiCurl’s Confident Curls Styling Solution, which claims to “form and define touchably soft curls“….this may be a better product for a wash n’ go, but I used it to set my twists (about 20 in total), and sealed the ends with shea butter. This being my first time using this JessiCurl product, I’m curious to see how it’ll turn out…

I’m sitting here now, with some clean, soft, yummy-smelling hair, and I’m glad I actually took the time to properly take care of business. Once my hair is completely dry (a process that seems to take longer and longer these days), I’ll see how this JessiCurl/shea butter concoction turns out….stay tuned!

 

 

September 18, 2011 

Are You Transitioning? Your Man Might Be, Too…

Photo: us.fotolia.com

Last night, I attended Dinner Delights with Afrobella – an awesome event put on by Soulafrodisiac! Another post will be coming shortly on that, but I was inspired to write this entry after the Q&A session with Afrobella.

She was detailing her transition from permed hair to natural, and mentioned that she relaxed her hair for the last time for her wedding. From that point on, she made the transition to natural hair, and I wondered, what did her new husband think? Then my brain started clicking even more, and I thought, how do the men in our lives make that transition along with us?

My question has nothing to do with a man’s “say” on his partner’s hairstyle. Each relationship is different, and whether you choose to wear your hair to please your man or to please yourself, that’s up to you. However, consider the Black man who has grown up around women with permed hair. Met you when you had permed hair. A while into the relationship, you decide to go natural. While you’re scrounging the net for styling and product tips to figure things out, he’s looking at you, attempting to figure things out too. What dynamics do you find there?

Photo: thefreshxpress.com

I’ll admit, this question is a bit selfish in nature, because the scenario I just posted is what I lived not too long ago. When I met my HomieLoverFriend, I was in my relaxer hey day. Thick, luscious straight hair that would swing around my shoulders or get pulled up into a cute topknot. The most “natural” he would see is when I threw in some cornrows or braids from time to time. Years into our relationship is when I started to suffer the extreme damage that inspired me to go natural (detailed here and here), but when I started my transition with kinky twists, even then he still figured it was “break time” and I’d be back to the relaxer soon. When I finally decided to cut off the remaining relaxed ends and rock my natural, he was kind of taken aback. It took him a WHILE to like it. It was short. I’d detangle and my curls would clog the bathtub drain. He would light up when I’d get it flat ironed, and would seem slightly downtrodden when I’d go back to the curls. It was just different.

I couldn’t understand why he couldn’t just like it as much as I did. I went through phases of insecurity, then would combat that with overly aggressive statements like “Well, go getchu a permed chick then! This is ME! I am NATURAL! Hear me ROAR!” He’d look at me like I was crazy. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said. “It’s your hair and you’re happy with it.” And that was the beginning of the turning point.

When I really checked it deeply (word to Sean Paul), I had to look at things from his perspective. Nearly every woman in his life, from family to friends to past girlfriends had permed hair. That’s what he grew up seeing, and that’s what he grew accustomed to. Biracial girls were the ones who rocked their curls, but just a regla’ Black chick like me? I came to realize that he (like a lot of other men) was just not exposed to that. I began to see that my transition was his too – he and I were learning about natural hair simultaneously, and I couldn’t discredit his role in the journey. If we’re blessed to have a daughter, he’s already ahead of the game on natural hair care (I’ll have to teach him how to twist, though). More importantly, he will be able to instill in her the feeling that she is beautiful just as she is. Should we be blessed to have a son, he’s going to play a vital role in showing him that Black beauty is more than just what is shown on TV and in magazines. Parents are children’s first role models – if ours see Mommy rock a huge afro puff, a curly twist out, and flat ironed hair in the same week, AND see that Daddy loves her just the same everyday, imagine how powerful that could be for a Black child?

Lil Bee & fam back in the day...

Anyways, I’m getting ahead of myself. The ultimate thing I had to learn during my journey is that I had to be patient. Not just with my hair, but with HomieLoverFriend too. I thought he was being unsupportive, when really he just was getting used to a different expression of me. I’d speak up when I felt he hurt my feelings, when really he was just asking a sincere question in his usual blunt style. Patience and discussion – those were the two most important things for me. He has his preferences like anyone else, but he loves ME. Every last little bit of ME. When you’re lucky enough to get to the point where you really, truly see that, it makes it all worth it.

September 12, 2011 

Is It Just Hair? Or Is It More Than That?

This morning, I was doing my usual web-trolling and hit up one of my faves, Curly Nikki. I love reading her “Naturally Glamorous” section that highlights round-the-way chicks who wear their hair in its natural state. I always love to read their techniques and favourite products (even though most aren’t even available in Canada) to see what new and wonderful things I can try with my ‘do. However, when reading about today’s featured “Naturally Glamorous” girlie, I read something that made me do a serious *pause*:

“How do you maintain length? Moisture?
My routine is all about moisturizing at each step and often with water, oils, and leave-ins. I avoid heat and tension at all costs and never go to bed without covering my head or otherwise allow my hair to come into contact with rough materials. *I even took the headrest out of my car, partly so my hair could fit, but also because I hated it rubbing against my hair.*”

- Curly Nikki’s Naturally Glamorous post

Accompanying this quote was a photo of the featured Natural honey, driving her car with NO HEADREST. As in, choosing to risk serious head and neck injury for the sake of her curls. And I thought to myself, “Is it REALLY that serious?”

I ride both sides of the fence at times.

Sometimes, I sit on the side that embraces the “natural movement” as something more than hair. Because so many thought natural hair could never look good, I was fixated on making sure mine looked GREAT. When little girls (like my goddaughter and niece) tell their parents that they want to wear their hair like mine, part of me smiles at the small victory of Black girls wanting to look like themselves, not Hannah Montana. I can sometimes relate to the autobiographies of women who have transitioned or big-chopped, who shed tears of joy and self-acceptance when they first wore their Afros out proudly. Memes of embracing oneself, of rejecting Eurocentric standards of beauty, and representing a huge part of the Black identity all touched me at one point or another, and made this natural journey an all-encompassing thing.

Then, on the other hand, sometimes it’s not that serious.

Men called me “Empress” and “Queen” when I started wearing my natural curls, but I never got these revered titles when my hair was relaxed. All I did was change my hairstyle….did that mean my inner spirit changed too? My flaws and negative attributes didn’t all disappear with the relaxer, so while I smiled at these new titles, I didn’t see the point. Sometimes I’d read other naturalistas’ regimens and wonder if any of them have friends or full time work – some of their routines were more complicated than university algebra taught in Latin. Then you get the Natural Nazis, ready to jump down anyone’s throat who dared flat iron, colour, or use “curl definition” products on their tresses. If I had a penny for every time someone argued about what is and isn’t considered natural, I’d have a whole lot of pennies.

As the years go by with me wearing my hair sans-relaxer, the more I see the importance in maintaining perspective. At times, I think people get so caught up in what their hair represents, that they forget to just enjoy their hair. Have fun. Cut it. Colour it. Weave it for the winter and flaunt your new growth in the summer. Let it be whatever you want it to be. Do that while still remembering and respecting that for many, this is a huge deal. Maybe not for you, but for that woman who never thought you could hold a corporate position with natural hair. Or maybe for that little girl who was going to ask her Mom for a perm, but points at you and now might just ask her to do “whatever that lady did”. But please, keep things in perspective. Know when to breathe, put down the Miss Jessie’s (or whatever product you’re addicted to), and step away from the bathroom mirror. And if you find yourself Googling “how to remove a car headrest”, that might be one of those times. Just sayin’.

August 21, 2011 

It’s My Nappiversary! Pt 2

The big chop vs. the gradual transition. This was the question back in 2007.

I had been perusing a number of American-based websites (Curly Nikki, Afrobella, and Black Girl With Long Hair to name a few), who discussed and extolled the virtues of transitioning, either through a dramatic “big chop” (cutting off ALL your hair to a style similar to this), or the gradual method (styling your hair in a manner that allowed you to grow your hair out naturally, such as this, this, or this)

I had relatively long hair my whole life. When I was 16 and wanted to do a Halle Berry pixie cut, my hairdresser flat out REFUSED to cut “all that good hair” – eye roll inserted here – so I never got to experience short hair. By the time I was considering the transition, I wasn’t willing to give up my length AND my relaxer. So gradual transition it was.

I had a love/hate relationship with braids growing up. Most were good experiences, but there was that one time my micro braids were done too tightly and with too heavy extensions…so my braids fell out. Of my head. From the root. Then there was the time I tried to do sew-in braids – I had my own hair cornrowed, and had the hair dresser sew in braided extensions. Took half the time, and looked just as good – until I was at a school basketball game, shook my hair out of the elastic that held it in a low bun, and had about 3 or 4 fall out on the bleacher floor. I scooped those bad boys up before anyone could see, and stuffed them in my purse, mortified as all hell. So I ixnayed the braid thing for a while, and moved to Plan B – the “kinky twist”.

Kinky twists are what I call the style I wore for a year or so. The hair is twisted instead of braided, and I used extensions that matched the texture of natural hair to add some length. It was a great move – didn’t take long to do, was just as versatile as braids, and I didn’t have to spend HOURS taking down the twists like I did with braids. Here are a few pics:

 All out

  Swept to the side

 Needed some heavy duty bobby pins, but pinning up was very possible

Maintenance was very lowkey – every week to two weeks I’d shampoo and condition my hair and let it air dry. Oil my scalp with whatever was handy (mainly products that were heavy with petroleum – bad choice for me now), and keep it movin’. I’d keep the twists in for about 3 months, then spend a day or two taking them down. Before I had them re-done, I’d do a really thorough deep condition (usually with V05 hot oils), cut a bit of the scraggly relaxed ends off, and peruse my new growth.

What was interesting to me was my shifting paradigm. During my relaxer days, signs of new growth were red alarms that something wasn’t right. As soon as my roots would get a bit puffy, and as soon as my edges didn’t lay as flat as I liked, I’d have my hair dresser on speed dial. However, when I really settled into the transition, I became very curious and always looked forward to peeking at these new kinks and curls taking over my head.

As curious and interested as I was, I still had some serious doubts. I hadn’t been reconnected with these curls since my childhood, and I didn’t even want them then. What was I going to do with my head NOW? I’ll admit – at times I hoped my hair would come out looking like Joan Clayton’s. I wished that it would just grow out of my head looking cute. And I hoped that I would somehow magically develop fingers that could do cute cornrows and flat twists – all the girls who I read about online would throw in a cornrow or two when their hair didn’t behave…but then I remembered I was born with two left hands full of thumbs and had NO SKILL in that area WHATSOEVER. As frustrated as I got, I was always up for the challenge, even in light of chuckles and negativity from family and friends. The end result (which I couldn’t even define then) would be worth it, I thought, so I stuck to my guns.

Finally, in mid-August 2008, I hit up a Toronto-based salon (not naming names, because the experience was quite uncomfortable and I believe they’re out of business now) to cut off the remaining relaxed ends…and was left with this:

And here is me…almost 3 years later, in June 2011:

In part 3 of this series, I’ll talk about how I got from August 2008 to now…one of the most eye-opening periods of my life…stay tuned!

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